"Once upon a time..." Every fairy tale starts that way, right?
When I was little, I remembered some nights when my grandmother was around, she would tell me stories about princesses and kingdoms, about princes and warriors. Even if your family did not tell you bedtime stories about princes and princesses, you were exposed to them nonetheless. Is it too hard to ask for a knight in shining armor? Or, for guys, where is that damsel in distress? I can see your face reading this right now, all scrunched up with indignation. Who is this girl, telling me that I have my head up in the clouds?
Many people today profess to be realists. We live in today. We are independent people. When we have dreams, we make things happen. Is that correct? As a self-professed realist, I share those thoughts. However, I realized that there is a different kind of fairy tale that my subconscious is slightly more inclined to clasp to. This kind of fairy tale doesn't usually start with the stereotypical "Once upon a time..." Some of them do start that way, but these few instances are aberrations from the norm. This kind of fairy tale usually starts with a drum rhythm and the flashing lights of blue and gold, showing a sign that say "20th Century FOX" or a lady in greco-romanesque outfit. Today, I want to talk to you about Hollywood influenced movies and TV series: why I am calling it the modern day fairy tale and the effects it have on the population in general. Also, I will be taking some examples from some of my favorite movies.
Movies are just like books, in the sense that they tell a story. They give people more of the instant gratification of knowing a story within the constraints of two hours rather than reading paragraphs and paragraphs of clusters of words. I love watching movies! It enables me to retreat from my daily activities into two hours of a world apart from mine. When you are watching an epic fantasy movie like Lord of the Rings, your mind would not make the inference that events depicted in the movie might come true in your life tomorrow. (It is a sad fact of reality that our world do not have elves and hobbits.) However, when you watch a romantic comedy set in 21st century Seattle, it is so hard to not hope something worth a Hollywood movie will happen to you tomorrow. Hence, what started out as a two-hour retreat from a hectic week turns out to influence values and morals and expectations in everyday life.
Movies are basically modern day fairy tales due to the aforementioned fact. After hearing the story of Snow White or Sleeping Beauty, little girls want to be princesses, and be whisked away by a prince. When they grow up, they will have embraced reality--finish school, get a job, etc. But somewhere in the deepest parts of their hearts, they will still be waiting for the perfect man to save
them from a "boring" life. After life beats the crap out of them, they will "settle" for a man less than perfect, but they will always still have that feeling of emptiness and longing. They will be longing for their happy ever after.
In this sense, movies have the same effects as fairy tales. Take, for example, one of the movies on my DVD rack, You've Got Mail, starring Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. The movie is a typical warm and fuzzy romantic comedy, with a long-lasting effect on reality. Meg Ryan's character found a man online with whom she shares a connection. However, she was already in a relationship at that time. What if a woman watches this movie and think to herself, "There might be someone better out there," even when she's already in a relationship? Also, having an emotional connection with someone other than your significant other is just so wrong. It's stupid, actually. Anyways, back to my point, what if every time this woman is in a relationship, she asks herself, "What if the love of my life, my soulmate, my happy ever after is still out there?" No wonder we have high divorce rates.
One movie that was released recently, and I happen to enjoy very much, is The Proposal, starring Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds. Is it okay to be in a relationship with a ruthless, cruel, disrespectful and abrasive person because you might think that after spending time with this person, they will change and becomes less of a jerk? What if they never change? What if that is their natural disposition? Then you're pretty much screwed. (For people that might be offended by the word usage, I didn't find any phrases that is poignant enough to communicate the thought.) It's really sad to see people get into real life relationships with the mindset that "I will change him/her." One day they'll wake up and realize that it's an impossible mission, and they're.. well.. stuck.
Hollywood does not only give us unrealistic expectations, it also presents us with values that, in my opinion, can be really stupid. (Pardon me, I have zero tolerance for stupidity.) Movies like The Ugly Truth (Sadly enough, I actually have seen the movie. The movie makes me sick.) share a unique perspective on love and relationships. After meeting a person with whom our character experienced a "spark," instead of trying to get to know the person, the question that engulfs the character is: how soon can I have sex with this person? What the heck!? It disgusts me that today's media equates sex to food. If you're hungry, then eat! Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
It gives me no pleasure to "bash" movies I love to watch, but in all honesty, I have to say that most of these movies set unrealistic expectations and values to life. A lot of the times, I get caught up with the emotions and romance and tension of movies, but then, once in a while, I step back and think: I don't want to live like them. Do you?
There's no such thing as a happy ever after. There's no such thing as the perfect man or woman. These things exist only in fairy tales, whether they are created by the Grimm brothers or Nora Ephron. My one explanation on why I think we love these fairy tales so much is because we are created with a desire for wonder, adventure, and romance. Believe me, true wonder, adventure, and romance cannot be experienced through living out Cinderella or 27 Dresses.
